Comparison is the Thief of Joy

Yesterday was my 35^th wedding anniversary.  And as I was looking at the pic of me smiling with not a care in the world, I was envious.  Even though I know that life was not perfect back then, it sure feels like it was easier/better/less complicated (?) than today.  And as I caught myself thinking this, it stopped me in my tracks.  Why am I doing this to myself?  Why am I comparing today to then? 

Comparison is the thief of joy.

And I’ve found myself doing this not just with this picture, but also with some of the changes that come with aging and menopause.  A student and I were chatting about the weight we’ve gained over the last few years (20 pounds since 2020 for me) and lamenting how we don’t fit into our clothes.  I look back at pictures of my body and my clothes and wish I could go back to that body.  But then I remember that I would look back at pictures from a decade before then and want to be in THAT body, in THAT time. 

Comparison is the thief of joy.

I chat with people about how their bodies ache and they can’t do all the things they used to.  Missing the more limber, mobile body they used to have.  The body that would spring out of bed, ready to conquer the day.  But then we talk about all the wisdom that we’ve gained over the years.  How slowing down allows you to see the world with new eyes.  How confident we feel in speaking our truth and sharing it with others.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Our yoga practice gives us the tools to release these covetous feelings.  Or at least recognize when they’re intruding and examine them and release them.  These feelings are part of the human condition and having them is not bad.  But do they bring us peace or joy?  Usually not.  In fact, most of the time these comparisons leave us feeling lacking and wanting.  When I begin to compare who am now to who I was back then, I must recognize that I had to be “her” (in the way back time) to be “me” in the present time.  And I wouldn’t change that for the world.  And I’m grateful.  Because I love the life I get to live today.  Even with the extra 20 pounds and few extra aches and pains 😊

Xx

Jesi